Your Story

Here's what I want you to do.
I want you to read this post as slow as possible.
Ten minute read, I'd say.
Let me take you somewhere nice.
And no, don't turn off the music. In fact, let it buffer if it's stopping in between. Don't read this without the music, please.


This is not you reading something I wrote. This is you reading, and imagining events of your own life. This is a movie playing in your head. This is your life.

Okay.

It's ten years from now, you've just come home from a long day's work. You don't want to do anything; you're so exhausted you just want to sit in that comfortable chair, dim the lights and think...just think...remember.
You're suddenly remembering this chapter of your life, when everything was new. Maybe it was the start of college, maybe you'd joined a new school, perhaps you'd started work somewhere.
You'd started, and felt out of place...you knew no one, no one knew you. The first few weeks were hard, not fun.
Then you got the hang of it, you made friends, you started living. You were enjoying yourself.
You remember a particularly fun day, maybe after working hours, you were just hanging around with your friends, laughing, being stupid.
And it was then that you saw her for the first time.
Who is she, you thought, she's beautiful.
You pointed her out to your friends. You asked them if anyone knew her name.
You wanted to know her name. You must have her name, you thought.
You thought about her before you slept that night. Then you didn't think about her for a while.
A few days later, you saw her again. You remembered the effect she'd had on you the last time you'd seen her. If only you had the guts to go up to her and talk.
You kept seeing her from time to time, always in a crowd, always from afar.
You found out her name. You sometimes stared at her long enough to have her look back at you. Your friends told you you should go and talk to her.
Naaa, you thought, I don't do things like that.
You asked about her from a few friends who knew friends of her's.
Is she seeing anyone?
No?
...
Okay, so what's she like?

Yeah, you talked about her a lot. And your friends, those idiots, they put ideas into your head.
Dude, she was looking at you today.
You should totally go and talk to her, man.

At night, before you sleep you fantasize about actually having the balls to go up to her and say, 'Hi, I'm...'
You fantasized about you two talking, and going out, being in a relationship, having the best time of your lives, making each other the happiest people alive. You fantasized about making her feel like the most special girl in the world, doing something for her on her birthday. Talking to her on the phone before you sleep each night.
You fantasized...
Then you started making all these plans in your head about how you're actually going to do it. About how you're actually going to go up to her soon and say, 'Hi, I'm...'
You thought to yourself, this is entirely plausible, I could do this. You felt that weird excitement when you thought this.
Plans turned into targets. You were going to do this that very week.
The week's about to end, it's Friday, people are excited about the weekend.
You have to do it today, your friends tell you.
She knows you like her, man!
Dude, she was totally checking you out.
Go fucking talk to her, you pussy!

You see her across the crowd, standing with her friends.
It's a perfect evening, the breeze is beginning to pick up. It's cool.
You're suddenly very aware you have these huge arms hanging at your side. You run a hand through your hair.
You need to go and talk to her, man, they say.
Man up!

You suddenly say 'screw this!' and now you're walking towards her.
Time suddenly slows down, and each step you take takes so much more time than usual. All this while, you're looking at her...as you walk.
You see everything in slow motion. The wind is making her hair sway. It's so bloody brilliant!
She flicks a strand off her face. You're three feet away now.
You're still walking.
You're almost next to her now.
You're still walking.
You've reached her.
She suddenly realizes you're standing next to her. You extend your hand forward and say, 'Hi I'm...'

Yes, you know what I'm talking about.

This is your life, and it's ending one minute at a time...